‘Arise, my love, my beautiful one, and come away.’ Song of Solomon 2:10 ESV
The Bible teaches us that the basis for a good marriage isn’t just sharing the same bed every night, but the same values and goals every day. Without those, it will be like talking to each other in a foreign language.
Now, you won’t always agree, and you must accept that. But if you want to reach the same destination you’ve got to follow the same road map. Like building a house, you need to work from an agreed-upon set of blueprints. After a while you discover that physical intimacy alone isn’t enough. That might get you through the night, but it takes genuine friendship and shared faith in God to get you through the years. We’re talking about husbands and wives who communicate without saying a word because the same purposes and principles govern their lives. And when problems arise, as they invariably do, they seek solutions from the same source—God.
When life fell apart for Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden, they came before God together because they had both had a relationship with Him. After all, how can you correct the problem if one of you doesn’t think there is a problem? True intimacy comes when the sex is over and the commitment is stronger than ever. It allows you to be with someone without always needing to impress them.
One author puts it like this: ‘When we know we’re loved because of who we are, we become healthier in mind and more intimate in expression. We’re freed from the fear of rejection and loosed from the anxiety of having to perform.’